Happy Halloween!

This has been the most long, boring, dumb day at work. Ever. Clearly a Monday.

The weekend was keee-razy. Went to a little Halloween get-together in the 'burbs on Friday night. Nothing spectacular, but pleasant. Danny, Jeff and I stayed up all freakin' night and drank everything but our shoes. We decided to start all over again bright & early Saturday morning. I don't really even remember any of that day. Stupid, huh??

We went back to Jeff's at about 4:00, chowed on McDonalds, then Danny and I crashed. I woke up on Jeff's couch at 9:00 and wasn't sure if it was AM or PM. Duh. Jeff's roommate informed us that Jeff went to the American Legion (what's with me and the Legion lately) that's right by their apartment. He was fo'shizzled when Danny and I got there. We just played the jukebox and then friends Mandy and Tom met us there.

Jeff was refused service and walked home. We proceeded to get a ride back to the city with Mandy and Tom, where I was to meet Denverboy and his friend. It was a Halloween party, but I'm not sure if we were in someone's apartment or a bar. I mean, the place was in an old apartment building, but it totally didn't look or seem like an apartment...kinda crazy. Anyway, my favorite costume I saw there were two girls dressed up like '70s Roller Derby. It was awesome. And I was obsessed with this girl, whom I kept calling Jackie Kennedy, even though she was supposed to be Audrey Hepburn. Pretty sure her boyfriend wanted to kick me in the back.

Ugghhh...I'm still recuperating. Will NOT be going out tonight - but *will* be vegging on the couch watching a scary movie, maybe...

I moved to Minneapolis one year ago yesterday! It's gone by fast...

TRICK OR TREAT!!

People LOVE The Goonies

Oh. Mah. Gah.

My blog is linked on VH-1's Best Week Ever! They even quoted me!

I was just looking at the entry page section of the SiteMinder (or whatever it's called) and I've had about 300-some visitors in the past hour...all looking at the Goonies 20-Year Reunion post...so investigated to see how so much exposure could be gained...and that's when I discovered that I'm on VH-1.

Maybe they'll ask me to be one of those people who comments on the "I Love the '80s" (et. al.) series!

I can see it now...instead of "Actor" or "Comedian," I'd be titled "Random 20-Something."

Awesome.

More '80s Pop Culture??

Wow. VH-1 did it again. Now they're on to "I Love the '80s - 3D." And, I for one, *am* loving it. I think it's pretty clear that I'm a nostalgia freak, so no complaints here.

1980 and 1981 were on tonight. I'll admit that I'm too young to really remember living during those two years (I was 2 and 3), however I do somehow remember most of what they covered.

I know that the toys and fads, songs, etc., carried through to the mid and late '80s, but how do I remember some of the commercials? For instance, how is that I remember the Pepsi Challenge? Was that an ad campaign that continued in to, say, 1984?

Some things that really stood out for me were: the Fashion Plates...where you created fashions by rubbing over the template (clearly I was a gay in training); Little Darlings (reruns, I'm sure) - I still love Tatum O'Neil; Gimme a Break (loved that show); The Barbara Mandrell Show (LOVED it); Penny Racers (I had a couple)... Juice Newton (don't even get me started) and "Elvira....Gette up a' boomp a' boomp, a' boomp, a' boomp, a' mau, mau...".

The early '80s, for me, were a time of worshiping my teenage sisters and Wonder Woman. That's probably how I have such memories of '80s music, movies, etc., b/c I went everywhere with my big sisters.

Case in Point: 1981. My most young sister (10 yrs older than I) had some friends over. One of them brought the little girl whom she was babysitting. I was 3. They put on the Grease album and wanted us to dance. I was too shy until that little bitch started upstaging me, and then I let loose like nobody's bidness. I got quite a lot of attention for that one. Pretty sure I got the "Looooook at me, I'm Sandra Dee...." to a tee.

Case #2: Circa 1983. My sisters tried taking me to Annie. I cried because it was all sold out. My sisters proceeded to flirt with the ushers and shut me up with candy. Marylee, who's now a good Catholic PTA mom, said to a boy in a red vest, "So....do you work here??" He said, "Yeah, whaddyou think...? I wear this to school...?" I'm guessing they made out in the '75 Buick, in which we rode. Who cares? I had Junior Mints while my other sisters bitched.

Case #3: LOVING it when my sisters' friends would come over. They'd dart past said sisters when entering the house to pinch my cheeks and play Muppets with me. They wore satin jackets and had Smurf shoestrings, I remember...

ANYWAY....back to Wonder Woman. I remember overhearing my Mom telling my Grandma and Aunt that she was buying a Wonder Woman birthday cake and coloring book for my 5th birthday and she said, "I don't know why, but he just *loves* Wonder Woman...??" Isn't that nice that she was willing to forego her wish that I'd be a little sports lover (like my brothers) to give in to my wish to fight the Nazis with Lynda Carter??

Kiddo in 1983. And my Mother claimed she "didn't know" when I came out?? Please...Nice frosting job (and Dorothy Hamill Wedge), by the way. Alien Wonder Woman, I guess...

I used to tie my brother (one year older) up with a jump rope and demand that he tell the truth about the Nazis (I didn't know what Nazis were, but I knew Wonder Woman didn't like them), then I'd dramatically jump off the coffee table and run in circles. Obviously, I had super powers.)

Don't even get me started on the Charlie's Angels routine.

I AM a nice person, dammit

I know I seem like a real bitch.

But, I really do have emotions. Seriously.

Everytime I see something on the Discovery Channel about someone who's considered a "Miracle Marvel," I just get teary-eyed.

You know who makes me *almost* cry the most? John Merrick. The Elephant Man. I just feel so bad for him. And here WE bitch about our appearances.....how vain! That poor guy...He once got off a train in London and the people chased him through the station to get him out of there..thinking he was a monster. He was just a 25-year-old with a horrible birth defect.

I really wish I could have been there to hug him and say, "You can come stay at my house..." I just want to cry thinking about it. Poor guy.

So, the next time you think that your appearance isn't pleasing, please be grateful that you don't look like poor John Merrick. Poor guy.


He's only about 25 here. Do you think you're pretty now??


Modern-day Science declared this is how he *should* have looked...

So, let's all think of this poor guy before we disdain ourselves....shall we??

Further restraint - almost...

This morning started off just great.

I woke up at the time I usually leave to catch my bus. So that's always a good feeling to start the day.

So, not wanting to be 30 minutes late, I got ready in Wonder Woman style - just spun around a few times and BOOM! I was dressed and ready to go fight crime.

Mind you, I'm usually running to catch a bus b/c they typically arrive every 3 minutes. Nope - Not on the day when I'm running late, of course.

I wait about 7 minutes getting all the more irritated because if the bus had been there when it should have been, I could have only been 10 minutes late for work. Yes, Instead the bus took forever and I knew I'd wind up being 15 minutes late - something my boss asked me not to do.

THEN, the bus was crowded as hell. There were about 5 of us getting on and it was already standing room only in there. Ugh. Poor people smell.

Anyway, the bus stopped a few blocks away and this gaggle of retirees got on. One old guy started yelling, "Move to the back everyone!"

I didn't blame him - the people standing behind me certainly had the ability to make more standing room up front -- and we did make room for these old people. But, this guy insists on bitching for 3 blocks and repeating how much it irritates him that people just don't want to move. Finally, he looked at me and demanded, "Move over so I can go back then..."

There were a ton of people already standing behind me. So I said, "What do you want us to do? There's no where to go back there - don't you see us all standing in the aisle??..."

And he replied with, "You people just don't want to move - there's all kinds of room back there, pal."

So I *calmly* said, "Don't call me Pal. And calm down - you'll have a stroke."

To which he simply said, "Jerk."

And I said, "Yes, I am..."

Seriously, am I a magnet for people who feel like instigating an argument?? I swear one of these days I'm really gonna go Glenn Close on someone.

Yay for Me!

I guess all your comments regarding my evil drunk twin may have done something.

I went to the same bar last night (to meet Bill and his boyfriend) and I didn't even yell once. In fact, one guy even bumped me and made me spill a little and I said sorry to him - earnestly!

I think I'll celebrate tonight by going to the grocery store, where I'll ram my cart into anyone who even so much as looks at me the wrong way. Hey, that pent up rage has got to escape somewhere...

Temper Tantrums

I need to really start thinking about cooling it down some when I drink.

Last weekend I got thrown out of a bar after being insulted by a homophobic red neck. That's almost understandable, as I was really just sticking up for myself and for Danny. At the next bar, I was quite calm, which I remained the rest of that evening.

However, this Saturday, Danny and I again had the brilliant idea to start drinking at lunchtime. We were also with another friend who felt this was a good idea. At about 8'ish at night, we were still there. I ordered three cosmos and the bartender, who knows me by name (sad), said he wasn't going to serve Danny anymore. This turned in to me thinking the random old guy on the other side of the bar was telling the bartender that we had been there all day and should go home. This ensued in me yelling a couple comments in random guy's direction. This resulted in the bartender throwing all the drinks down the sink and telling the three of us that we were finished. This resulted in me using the F-bomb a few times and wanting to walk out. I calmed down after Danny and other friend just stared at me...so, I apologized to the bartender.

Still - that's ridiculous. I need to lose my paranoid tendencies that everyone's out to get me when drinking. And also stop going to the bar in the early afternoon. And maybe get some exercise instead. Duh.

Also, Jeff was supposed to hang out with us Saturday night. We had been planning it for two weeks. He didn't bother to call me & cancel, but left a voicemail for Danny instead. So, I called him and left my own voicemail: "Lose my number. Goodbye."

Who the hell do I think I am, anyway?? Oh, that's right...a Kennedy.

Guess I'll go to the Sports Store

Well, although the vote rang thru for me to be a Kennedy for Halloween, it just doesn't look like it's going to happen. The only Harvard sweaters I've been able to find are $100 or more. I'm not spending that much to pretend to be a Harvard graduate! So, looks like friend Jeff and I will be going to Dick's Sporting Goods (or whatever it's called -- like I've ever set foot in there) for soccer gear.

Maybe I can go to Halloween as Pele Kennedy...??

Any suggestions on other items I could wear that would clearly portray that "I'm a Kennedy, dammit!!"

Halloween Decisions

What should I be for Halloween??


Option One: A few of us thought going as members of a soccer team would be cute, because, well, soccer boys are cute...


See, he's cute...


Option Two: At Homecoming, some college friends suggested I go as a Kennedy. This would involve a Harvard letter sweater, white pants and dock shoes...and of course, a cocktail always in hand.


The sweater


The family - The look


What do you think??

I mean, I practically already live everyday as a fabulous Kennedy, but never appear as a soccer guy...Decisions, decisions...

I don't belong here.

This weekend is just a blur.

Wound up meeting Danny at Over the Rainbow in St. Paul at about 1:30 on Saturday afternoon. How sad is that?? It was just a really nice day and both of us were in the mood for it. There's something I really like about spending a sunny, warm Saturday afternoon in a dark bar. Seriously. We proceeded to the (brace yourself) AMERICAN LEGION in a suburb called Apple Valley, where Danny's friend was hanging out with her sister playing bingo. She's a very young 50-something - well, except for the fact that she goes to the American Legion. It was actually kind of fun. Something different, anyway. Well then, karaoke started and we were thoroughly enjoying ourselves. Miss Nancy Sinatra came on and the girl singing was doing quite well to "These Boots are Made for Walkin." Danny and I felt inspired to dance. An older guy came up to us and said, "This isn't that kind of bar...guys don't dance with guys here."

That's about all it took for me. Ever seen Jack freak out and do the silent screaming on Will & Grace?? Yeah, that's pretty much how I was back to him. And guess who got kicked out?? You got it. Me.

I said to Danny, "See - this is why I don't hang out in the f'ing suburbs!" Later, at his friend's house, her boyfriend apparently thought I was being loud or something and said, "You already got kicked out of one bar..." Like it was my fault! So, I let loose on him too and Danny and I left. Back to the city.

Stupid suburbs.

Is that a Q or or a G?

Although I'm not a fan of blog spam, that new word verification thing is a pain in my arse. I almost always have to retype it because I got it wrong the first time. Does this mean I need glasses or maybe I only need them in a fun house?


Hate it

Anyway, I'm off to go on a semi-blind date. Okay, it's just to "check out" a guy my brother's ex-girlfriend thinks I would dig. He works part-time at a restaurant, so my bro and I are meeting there for dinner and I guess this dude is supposed to be working tonight.

Ex girlfriend said he's funny, sarcastic as hell, smart, and handsome. I'm guessing handsome means he looks better than Sloth on the Goonies, yet not quite Jon Jon Kennedy.


If only we weren't related...and he hadn't died.

We'll see...